Leaving A Toxic Work Environment

Tracy Kennedy brings decades of leadership & team development experience to light with optimism and practical strategies.

Many of us have experienced the murky waters of a work culture gone wrong. My clients regularly share accounts of dysfunction, hostile workplaces and mind-boggling examples of poor leadership. Let’s unpack the signs—and impacts—of a toxic work environment and what to do if you find yourself there.

Toxic Environments Take Many Forms

The Work in America survey by the American Psychological Association found that “19% of workers say their workplace is very or somewhat toxic, and more than 1 in 5 workers say they have experienced harm to their mental health at work.”

Negative behaviors and conditions found in a toxic workplace might include unrealistic or unclear expectations, poor work-life balance, dishonest communication, micromanagement (or managing from the mountaintop), continuously shifting goals, gossip, criticism, discrimination, sparse or excessive feedback, exclusion, favoritism, inflexible policies, office politics and lack of recognition and growth.

Toxic workplaces don’t just leave employees unhappy or frustrated. They lead to chronic levels of stress, burnout, low productivity, mental health issues, low morale, fear and even physical illnesses.

Across organizations, toxicity erodes trust and lowers engagement, leading to higher turnover rates and poor business outcomes.

What Can You Do?

Consider this advice I was given years ago: There are three solutions to every problem: accept it, change it or leave it. If you can’t accept it, change it. If you can’t change it, leave it.

Accept It

There are times when elements are out of our control, and the best thing to do is keep your head down and ride it out. Now, I’m not recommending you stay in a toxic work environment negatively affecting your life, but sometimes, a paradigm shift is your best bet.

A friend recently shared his frustrations about a toxic boss. He’s tried for years to influence change but found it fruitless. Now, as he gets closer to retirement, he’s decided his best option is to stay. However, to stick with it, he had to shift his perspective.

Instead of focusing on his discontent, he is embracing the role’s positive aspects, including its inherent flexibility and fulfilling relationships. He has created strong boundaries and focuses on how this job is the best way to support his family and future.

Conversely, one of my clients lived the “accept it” mantra for too long, and it took a toll. Her candle was extinguished; she couldn’t sleep, had chronic anxiety and was seeing a therapist to manage the impacts.

If you feel completely burned out from a toxic work environment and it’s affecting other parts of your life, it’s probably time for change.

Change It

A recent Gallup survey showed that 51% of employees are watching for or actively seeking a new job, and only 25% would recommend their employer as a great place to work. Although a hefty percentage of the population is comfortable with moving on, that’s not always the best (or first) option.

Consider these ways to change your situation.

• Identify what’s really going on. What is having the most significant negative impact on you? Get specific. In many cases, those negatively impacting your environment may not even realize they are doing so. Some people thrive under intense pressure or with “radical candor,” while those scenarios may cause intense angst and excess stress for others. Assess if you’re in a toxic environment or simply facing a cultural or style misalignment.

• Initiate tough conversations. To the point above, discussing your experience is critical to see if it can change. Honest feedback and real conversations aren’t easy but are necessary to shift a situation.

• Find an influential ally. Who can you work with to drive change? Your boss, colleague or mentor? If your manager is the toxic force, find another ally in a position of authority. Maybe it’s HR (or maybe not), but make sure it’s someone who has the clout to hear your concerns and help take action.

• Identify your nonnegotiables. Decide what you will and won’t accept. For example, if you’re facing a lack of work-life balance, commit to having early morning meetings only once a week or not working on weekends or evenings.

Leave It

I’ve worked with many people who have tried to accept or change things but just can’t do it anymore. The impact is too significant, and as one client said, “I completely lost myself.”

If this is the case, it’s time to go. Here’s how.

• Identify the risks of staying. Most people stay because they’re scared, don’t know what to do next or are concerned about financial stability. But what is the greater risk? Imagine your life a year from now if you stay. If you don’t like what you see, move on.

• Map your exit. Identify what fears or concerns are keeping you there and how to depart comfortably and safely. Put those things in place, and take the first step.

• Recover. The sneaky thing about burnout is that it wears you down over time. It can take months to get back in balance physically, mentally and emotionally. Take care of yourself: exercise, meditate, journal, eat healthfully, spend time with friends and family, seek support from a therapist or coach and prioritize sleep.

• Rebuild confidence. One client reached out to me after years in a toxic environment that destroyed her confidence. We worked to get her back on track by revisiting her core values, key strengths and positive attributes. We highlighted times of success in her life and career and separated what was hers to fix and what was planted from a toxic workplace.

• Assess your learnings. Don’t jump out of the frying pan into the fire. Take this opportunity to step back and identify what you’ve learned about yourself and what kind of environment, boss and workplace will serve you best in the future.

Final Thoughts

There’s no one-size-fits-all approach to leaving a toxic workplace. If you’re burned out, experiencing the impacts of a toxic work culture and barely surviving, it’s time to act. Which of these strategies can you move forward to reclaim control and happiness? You’ve got this.

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